For ever young.

Another trip to Tirumala to see the ever youthful Lord. The look of a apprehensive bridegroom is so rewarding. I suddenly have an urge to note down the feeling one gets in seeing the lord. yes last fortnight when we saw him after the kalyanam in the oonjal sevai he looked happy contented and proud. the joy radiating is so full of contentment. where as the same idol in the Kalyana utsavam is so filled with apprehension as if waiting for the ritual to get on and once the wedding is over this is my full form so to say etc. These days they do not do sankalpa as was done earlier the people taking part has gone up 100 times I miss those days when they used to be only a hand full of couples and there were two categories of sevai. and we sat in the front row so close the ritual was elaborate and we spent almost the whole morning with the Lord what a satisfying effect the children were small but in spite of all that we enjoyed being there. even oonjal sevai some times we were only three families performing and the children got a chance to sing to the lord. one particular time they were able to sing three songs. today the full seva takes just fifteen minutes and we are ushered out of the hall. The Lord seems to have got busy he has to give his darshan to so many more people now the devotees are unending. but nothing beats the view of the lord in Kalyana utsavam. how does one explain it. the joy is so satisfying. He seems like your child yet he is the all knowing and you are so ignorant. yet he gives you the feeling that you are performing his wedding. what a wonder for times inmemorial he has been playing the same role every day going through the same experiences. getting up like a reluctant child growing up so fast that he reaches a marigable age kalyanam and then satisfied oonjal sevai by the evening he is the lion in control of everyting the merry time spent in the deepa alankaram in the evening is yet another beautiful ritual. this goes on every day life goes on only we take so very long to get aware of the play.
Tiruchanoor though we get to see the thayar so close yet I want to stand next to her to see her every move her looks her thoughts especially the basket like mookuthi she adorns. it is so beautiful only she can do it. how could anybody manage a basket of a nose ring. it looks so heavy but she adorns it with so much grace. I enjoy watching her with that nose ring but I come back so unsatisfied. just a little more time ma till I am saturated with that view. some blessing of my grandfather and mother that I am able to go there. yes only me in our family is lucky enough to have the darshan so often. unexplainable this feeling. so much excitement before the trip to tirupati and Tirumala. how does one prepare like giving an exam best method I found is to sing his praise. in the ever so many songs. others have written and rendered. pray that at every visit the devotion should grow a hundred fold.

This time the experience was unique. one I had not witnessed for so many years. not that I remember of. It seemed that the Lord after Garuda vahana  sevai on the full moon day Wednesday was very reluctant to spend much time decking himself up and decided that he would give his darshan shun the dressing and jewels. how lucky we were. I treasure this view so much. we must live in this glory itself we have no need for anything nothing to ask of him.