A friend in Mama, a Philosopher
in Tatha and Guide in Anna.Muaji amma mama
friend.
A mother is your first
God.She was our all. Her passing away has created such a vast void in all of us
our life it's difficult to put it in writing. No one can replace a mother. We
could go to her with any problem she would always have a solution or direction
for us to take. Her just being around could create magic to the atmosphere. She
had a special aura which attracted us to just be our natural self. Amma
accepted us as we were, encouraged us with words and set values by herself
living it.
courageous as she was
she never hesitated to take a stand in any situation and stuck to her
decision she had a unique way of doing things prioritizing how a job
should be done she made a system for everything be it cooking, cleaning, caring, singing, playing the Sitar with Masiba In fact they together were a good combination and got along very well, I rather we all would wait for Masiba to come home on saturdays for she used to bring new dishes she had prepared in college, She was studying Home science. Masi always wanted moms opinion on most matters, both of them enjoyed their Pondicherry trip and looked forward to it, they usually came back with ideas for some new craft, praying, painting, doll making knitting her work area had to be neat be it
doll making or sitting to embroider she was a whole package of creativity
she put her full concentration on the job at hand. for example cooking she
would clear the area and keep all the things she required at hand and then
start cooking, vessel washing she would stack all the cups spoons plates etc
together and then go about cleaning them if some wanted extra scrubbing it was
done before and then stacked for cleaning thus setting a system, her clothes
washing drying etc were worth watching, her shell doll making was a special art the shells had to be chosen from frequent trips to Pondicherry( the collection) then they were individually painted oil painting and then stuck with sealant used in postage packets just the right quantity melted and fixed at the exact position to form a human figure or dress the color combinations were very interesting, any thing she did was to perfection.
She loved to read and waited anxiously for kalki and ananda vikatan later
on when she learnt to read Gujarathi she waited for jan kalyan she was a great
writer too she wrote me two letters she would wait for letters from her family
siblings, her folding clothes she did it in such a way it did not need
ironing at all. her saree folding and drying on the high up rod. she was very
neat. She made things presentable she used to tell us with so many girls around
if when people came home they should see things sparkling and clean. she never
hesitated to let us do things we liked. She saw that we learnt swimming,
driving etc . She herself was always occupied; she never complained or found
fault but corrected things where possible. she could get along with anyone any
age she adjusted and was forward thinking even the grand children and their
family will vouch for this. She allowed me to join Jaycees; she never forced
her decisions on us. I can write pages with no end about her, As my sister
was saying the other day when photographs were taken she would see that the
backdrop was good or else she used her saree for the backdrop. oh there
are so many things one can write about her unending. Of course we did have maids cooks and drivers but very often we had to manage home chores ourselves.
Philosopher Tatha.
what we are today, all
of us is because of our association with him. we cannot write a tribute to our
parents without mentioning Tatha. A great philanthropist. Often I would ask
amma how we associated with Tatha and she would narrate how at first when Tatha
was operated for cancer in America and came there was very little he could or
would eat and he was unable to talk until they used the mike pressed against his vocal chord to be audible. His mother Badeamma would send forth for my mother and get
suggestions as to how to make food that tatha could eat my mother managed to
give almost everything by mashing crushing those days were no mixie days we had
the special crusher hand operated ones to use. The bond between the families
grew by both contributing for the welfare of the other. Thatha was instrumental
in our upbringing and we learnt many great things from him. He was a thorough
business man meticulous in his working and management. a Father figure for all
of us my parents included. We looked up to him for direction and what he said
was law. Nobody had the guts to say anything to him but i remember disagreeing
with him on two occasions and he finally did consider my view and we did come
to an agreement for the situation. He was a voracious reader and often he
would get us to read to him the topics he had marked out be it paper or magazines.
he taught me money management cataloging sorting his records both investments
and cash was always up to date by end of the day. he would not go to bed unless
he had completed that days updation the shares and correspondence had to be
filed at the end of the day some days it would be late at night but it was
never put away for the morrow. alert and interested in everything happening
around him. He was well connected and was known among the great men in town.
genuine interest in people he came in contact with he always thought of their
welfare. Those days applications for shares etc would be delivered with the
newspaper and dad would get these to him they would together on Tathas
instructions would fill in the forms and invest he taught dad to maintain
records of these very important papers. We all did learn a lot from these
incidents.
Guide Anna.
Only in Karnataka and
especially Mysore Tamilian's have the habit of calling their father
Anna.
There is no script for
this language they read and write Kanada so also in Gujarat Father is
referred to as Kaka or Kaku. meaning uncle here too they speak katchi which
has no script they read and write Gujarathi, only for the speaking
dialect is used. , in bengali too they say dada for father.
So Anna he was for all of us I remember his friends had come home and /Father was in the last room upstairs and we children were busy playing in the courtyard downstairs near the fountain besides the children making noise the noise from the water fountain in the center of the house the sparrows chirping etc. the watchman comes and says chote saab ke dost ayehai baby papa ko bula lau so i scream anna your friends have come can you please come down. we had a very impressive visitors sitting room downstairs usually the watchman dare not enter it to come to the other door quiet close by leading to the stairways upstairs and the beautiful courtyard. but that day he did venture as probably all were busy with the Bhagvath sapta on that week. My fathers friends mistook me for his sister and referred to me as his sister he laughingly corrected them saying she is my third daughter. Anna looked very young for his age even after the four of us were born he could pass off as a handsome bachelor. Once when he went to collect his pension he was asked to send his father to collect the pension as it would not be given to the son. he had to prove that it was his own pension he was collecting or come to collect. He was very quick on his feet and meticulously clean and orderly stickler for keeping things in its place. my younger sister has this habit from him i suppose. his own books clothes were last attended to he would see that all our books were properly covered he did this himself would type out the labels giving full details of name class subject school all neatly piled so was our uniform neatly ironed and piled up ready for school the next day our shoes polished with the socks yes only he would fold the socks up so neatly we had to just slip into them and pull the end up no great issue even with closed eyes we could be sure it would be right and perfect (folded at the heel on the right side the wrong side coming up all the way and inserted into the shoes) On Fridays it used to be the sports white all well polished set out in age order. that was the only discipline other of course was time to stop play and get to serious study. no matter what we had to be back home at that hour i think it was 6 pm. yes vatsu i remember he used to get us mud goglets of different sizes all six lined up in a row and we would drink water only from our own all aranged in age order so we knew exactly which was meant for us. and mom sitting up with us at night when we had to prepare for our exams etc. those memorable days. oh bachpan ke din laut ke aana.
Anna's English was
excellent. he loved pitman's short hand and tried to teach us short hand when
we were in college. i was so impressed that i enrolled in a typing institute to
learn typing. yes i did go for the exam but was mesmerized with the music
created by all the type writers in that huge big darbar hall of the womens
college (where I studied later)that i gave in my paper after the time limit
only quater finished. I did not care i was not secretary material more the boss
type. My grand daughter says pati do'nt boss me when i sit with her for her
online school these days.
Anna even for that
matter Tatha never drove the car he preferred his office
chuffer driven car we had two drivers one Ambassador for Tatha to go to
the mills and one morris minor for the children to be dropped off to school and
other classes etc. I enrolled in all types of classes tailoring classes
cook/baking classes typing classes driving classes Bhagvad gita classes dancing
classes. I was the only one who worked before i got married and i went the gov
way enrolling in employment exchange getting a job through them i
preferred doing things on my own no recommendations. i did land up a
job at the high court and got a preferred placement too people used to ask me
how come i got into the specials department where people were selected only after
experience and selections were made only after the persons were tested. we had
to take a special oath that what we did was never reveled to any one outside of
work. anna was proud that i had got that job.
Anna was fond of
listening to carnatic music which were broadcast on the radio late into the
night on week ends. He never ever absented himself from work or other duties
people loved him for that a very depended person its over nearly 35 years now
we lost him. he did miss out on seeing how our life turned out to be he did of
course play with all his grand children took them to parks to play
etc.
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