kahyō na parata, binu kahē na rahyō parata, baṛō sukha kahata baṛē sōṁ, bali, dīnatā. prabhukī baṛā'ī baṛī, āpanī chōṭā'ī chōṭī, prabhukī punītatā, āpanī pāpa-pīnatā. 1. duhū ōra samujhi sakuci sahamata mana, sanamukha hōta suni svāmī-samīcīnatā. nātha-gunagātha gāyē, hātha jōri mātha nāyē, nīca'ū nivājē prīti-rītikī prabīnatā. 2. ēhī darabāra hai garaba tēṁ saraba-hāni, lābha jōga-chēmakō garībī-misakīnatā mōṭō dasakandha sō na dūbarō bibhīṣana sō, 857 būjhi parī rāvarēkī prēma-parādhīnatā. 3. yahām̐kō sayānapa ayānapa sahasa sama, sūdhau satabhāya kahē miṭati malīnatā. gīdha-silā-sabarīkī sudhi saba dina kiyē hō'igī na sā'īṁ sōṁ sanēha-hita-hīnatā. 4. sakala kāmanā dēta nāma tērō kāmataru, sumirata hōta kalimala-chala-chīnatā. karunānide hāna! baradāna tulasī cahata, sītāpati-bhakti-surasari-nīra-mīnatā. 5. Vers [Oh Lord, I am in a dilemma.] It is not possible (or it is difficult) to say anything, but equally difficult to keep quiet (kahyō na parata, binu kahē na rahyō parata) 1 . I invoke your gracious and merciful nature to gather enough courage to humbly submit before you (bali, dīnatā) that though it is true that a person feels very glad and relieved when he narrates his tale of woes, miseries, sufferings and problems in front of his able superiors (baṛō sukha kahata baṛē sōṁ), but still I feel hesitant to do so when on the one hand I consider the Lord's greatness and the on the other hand the inconsequential nature of my complaints (prabhukī baṛā'ī baṛī, āpanī chōṭā'ī chōṭī), as well as my impertinance and meanness in approaching the Lord who is so holy and pure while I am so sinful, lowly and pervert (prabhukī punītatā, āpanī pāpa-pīnatā). [ 1 A similar dilemma is faced by Tulsidas earlier in verse nos. 111 and 256 of this Book ‘Vinai Patrika’. To wit, though usually it is so comforting for a distressed person who is suffering from some kind of trouble to tell his Lord about his problems because it relieves his mental stress at once and assures him that his Lord would certainly solve his problems, but in my case I feel very reluctant to do so. The reason is that my problems are so tiny that there are not worth telling the Lord, as he would smile at me and say “you are like a child who gets upset by small things; why are you so perturbed by these inconsequential things which should not bother you at all if you regard yourself as my servant and devotee in the first place”. A seeker must keep in mind the stature of the giver when asking for anything from the latter. For instance, if a person is given a rare chance to present himself before the king of the realm and ask for something, would he be so stupid to ask for worthless things and waste away this rare opportunity, or would he be wise to ask for some rare gift that suits the stature of the king, that does not undermine the king’s majesty and greatness when this gift is shown to the world? Surely, only a mad person would ask a king for giving him something to eat for a day; it would be laughable! The king would judge the nature, the character, the personality and the status of that person by what he asks from the king. It won’t behove good for a man of noble upbringing to ask for tiny and worthless gifts from a king if the latter is so pleased with him that he is willing to give whatever is asked for. It’s better not to ask for anything at all than seeking rubbish. Tulsidas says that Lord Ram is not an ordinary King. He is the Supreme Being and the Lord God himself. So if one is given a chance to ask something from the Lord, wouldn’t it be wise to ask for something rare and special—such as seeking spiritual welfare, eternal beatitude, the purest kind of bliss and happiness, for liberation and deliverance from the cycle of transmigration and its attendant miseries, 858 and for emancipation and salvation of the soul? Isn’t is so absurd and ridiculous to ask the Lord to relieve worldly sufferings which would howbeit certainly end one day when this gross body is discarded at the time of death? Wouldn’t it be better and wiser for him, therefore, to leave everything at the discretion of the Lord by asking for nothing but for the Lord’s grace and mercy, because then the Lord would himself be in a dilemma as what to give to Tulsidas that would suit the Lord’s majesty and stature. Obviously, the Lord would go on giving and giving but still think that it is not enough and in accordance with his stature; the Lord would feel self-conscious and think that whatever he has given to Tulsidas, or for that matter to any other seeker, is not much and enough. By adopting this approach, Tulisdas would get to keep the cake and eat it as well: that is, he would be not only be relieved of all his worldly miseries and sufferings but in addition be blessed by eternal peace and happiness as well as by the reward of liberation, deliverance, emancipation and salvation even without his asking for them. So Tulsidas says that he is in a fix, not being able to decide what to do and say before the Lord.] (1). Considering both these aspects (as outlined in stanza 1 herein above), my Mana (mind and heart) becomes reluctant due to hesitation (i.e., I can't gather courage to speak anything before your majesty) (duhū ōra samujhi sakuci sahamata mana). But when I hear about the Lord’s magnificent virtues, his graceful and magnanimous temperament, and his nature to welcome and accept with courtesy and politeness even the most lowly, the fallen, the downtrodden, the distressed and the wretched ones, I feel confident and gather courage once again (to approach him and narrate my woes to him) (sanamukha hōta suni svāmī-samīcīnatā). Oh Lord (nātha)! It is well known that when someone sings your glories and pays tribute to you by bowing his head before you (gunagātha gāyē, hātha jōri mātha nāyē), then howsoever he may be lowly, sinful and wretched you have invariably made such a person fully contented and fulfilled (nīca'ū nivājē prīti-rītikī prabīnatā) 2 . [ 2 To wit, you are so kind-hearted and magnanimous that if a person stands before you and praises your glorious nature, then you grant him boons so liberally that he is left with nothing more to expect or want. Oh Lord, you are inclined to receive and welcome your devotees very respectfully, notwithstanding how wretched, resourceless, distressed, downtrodden, maligned, sinful and tainted they are. When they sing your divine glories and pay their obeisance to you by bowing their heads before you, you feel glad to shower your grace and benevolence upon them so much so that they feel delighted and fulfilled in every possible respect.] (2). In this royal court (of Lord Sri Ram) everything is ruined by haughtiness, vanity, pride and ego (ēhī darabāra hai garaba tēṁ saraba-hāni), while being humble, meek, poor and courteous results in not only obtaining the rewards of welfare and good fortunes but also of one’s sustenance and well-being that become assured (lābha jōga-chēmakō garībī-misakīnatā). [Some of the instances are now cited here.] There was no one as ‘fat’ as (i.e. as famous in valour, strength and powers as the demon king of Lanka known by the name of) Ravana, whereas no one was as ‘thin’ as (i.e. weak and humble as his 859 brother) Vibhishan (mōṭō dasakandha sō na dūbarō bibhīṣana sō)—but in their case, your preference for the virtues of affection and total surrender (by the devotee Vibhishan) comes to the fore clearly (būjhi parī rāvarēkī prēma-parādhīnatā) 3 . [ 3 This story of Lord Ram accepting Vibhishan and declaring the reason for this acceptance, as well as of the Lord declaring him as the future king of Lanka which meant sure death of Ravana indirectly, has been narrated in the epic “Ram Charit Manas”, in its Sundar Kand, from Chaupai line no. 6 that precedes Doha no. 41—to Chaupai line no. 2 that precedes Doha no. 50. When Vibhishan was insulted publicly and kicked out of the kingdom of Lanka by his elder brother Ravana, the former came to surrender before Lord Ram. The Lord had then most cheerfully welcomed Vibhishan and gave him shelter when the Lord saw that he was utterly distressed and needs the Lord’s protection. Further, when Lord Ram observed that Vibhihan is very loyal to him and has great devotion for him, the Lord decided to eliminate Vibhishan’s tormentor, i.e. his elder brother Ravana, and restore his honour by crowning him on the throne of Lanka. This preference shown towards Vibhishan over his arch rival Ravana, though both were brothers belonging to the same demon family, establishes the fact that Lord Ram shows an inclination to favour anyone who has affection and devotion for the Lord, no matter how resourceless, powerless and humble he may be. At that time Lord Ram did not think twice that accepting Vibhishan would anatagonise his powerful enemy Ravana who still held the Lord’s wife Sita in his captivity, and that this might prove dangerous for her safety.] (3). Here (in Lord Ram’s court), having and showing off one’s cleverness, cunning, tricks and crookedness are equivalent to thousands of stupidities and foolish behaviours combined into one (yahām̐kō sayānapa ayānapa sahasa sama). [To wit, one should not try to be smart and deceitful before the Lord. It would be highly stupid to do so.] Verily and forsooth, in the court of Lord Ram, all blemishes, sorrows, darkness and malignancies of a person are erased by his honestly accepting his sins, miseeds, faults and misdemeanours with a mind and heart that are frank, truthful, pure, simple, straightforward and deceitless (sūdhau satabhāya kahē miṭati malīnatā). If you (Tulsidas says to himself) remember the fate of the Vulture (Jatau), the Stone (Ahilya) and Sabari4 (gīdha-silā-sabarīkī sudhi saba dina kiyē), your love, affection and devotion for the Lord will never diminish (hō'igī na sā'īṁ sōṁ sanēha-hita-hīnatā) 5 . [ 4 The story of ‘Jatau’, the vulture, has been narrated in verse no. 57, stanza no. 3 of this Book ‘Vinai Patrika’; that of ‘Ahilya’, the cursed wife of sage Guatam who had become a stone, in verse no. 43, stanza no. 3; and that of ‘Sabari’, the outcaste tribal woman, in verse no. 152, stanza no. 8. 4 They were all lowly, wretched, humble, outcastes—but seeing their faith, love and devotion, the Lord accepted and liberated them cheerfully. The Lord gave them eternal peace and happiness; he granted them liberation and deliverance from the horrible life they were leading, and the Lord gave their souls the boon of emancipation and salvation. Tulsidas says that if one remembers their fate then one feels very comfortable and reassured of peace and freedom from torments associated with life in this world because he too would be protected by Lord Ram. But one must remember that it is only possible if one has complete faith, devotion and affection for 860 Lord Ram and his divine name. Simply reading their stories is of no good if no lesson is drawn from it.] (4). Your name (i.e. Lord Ram's holy name) can fulfil all desires like the Kalpa Tree (which is the all wish-fulfilling heavenly Tree of the Gods) (sakala kāmanā dēta nāma tērō kāmataru). Immediately on remembering your holy name, all the sins, evils, vices, deceits, trickeries, crookedness and falsehoods of Kaliyug get disintegrated and become harmless (sumirata hōta kalimala-chala-chīnatā). Oh Lord who is an abode of mercy and compassion (karunānidhāna)! Tulsidas wants only this one boom (baradāna tulasī cahata)—that he should always remain floating like a fish is in the holy water of river Ganges that is symbolised by the nectar of having devotion and affection Lord Ram who is the husband of Sita (sītāpatibhakti-surasari-nīra-mīnatā) 5 . [ 5 To wit, Tulsidas essentially says that just like a fish that cannot survive a moment without water, he too should not live a moment without having devotion and affection for Lord Ram.] (5). [Note—In this verse, the emphasise is on having unwavering devotion, faith and affection for Lord Ram and his divine and holy Name.]
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